Dear Kohl’s:

December 17, 2008 at 8:33 am (Ramble)


This crap just ain’t right.


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Could NOT Resist

October 9, 2008 at 2:29 pm (Ramble)

worry kitteh haz bin watching teh newz agin

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September 22, 2008 at 8:54 pm (Ramble)

I’m apparently still getting the hang of posting on a blog. My, how life has happened since I last posted! First of all, the newest cycle of ANTM premiered! That was probably the biggest event that’s occurred so far.
Actually, upwards of a hundred awesome things have transpired since my last post. Jess and I got MARRIED! Finally! Transitioning to married life has been like butta. We already know each other so well (I mean, fa-rizz, we’ve been together for six years), so it’s just been a blast to finally live and be together as husband and wife. The ceremony, reception, honeymoon, everything was AMAZING! Click the photo below to check out our sweet pics.





Got a job! I work here:



Okay, so I work in this vicinity. It looks like this picture was actually taken from my building, which isn’t as majestic as the adjacent promenade for the hotel across the street. But whatevs. It’s the best I could do.


My official position is Library Technician III. Not quite a library Associate, and I don’t have the Master’s to be called a Librarian, but hey, I can still laugh with superiority at the Tech I and II’s. Which I definitely take advantage of whenever possible. But on the serious: it’s an awesome job, I pretty freakin’ awesome at it, and they pay for my and Jess’ Master’s degree! At (count ’em) 11 universities in the University System of Maryland! So the pasture is green, to say the least. I’m pretty sure imma get my Master’s in Library Science, because it’s 12 classes, I know my stuff, and it’s free. But I can’t start until the summer. 

So until then…





I’m taking a Spanish class online through UMUC!



6 Spanish courses, and I’ll have my Spanish in the Workplace certificate. I don’t necessarily need the cert, but taking these classes gets me one step closer to my dream of interrupting those who talk about me in a foreign language with a smarmy comment in their native tongue. That’s what it’s all about, folks. I also wanna save up for Rosetta Stone, so I can learn Gaelic. Also superfluous, but awesome.

What Jess and I are currently watching:

Like it’s nobody’s business. We absolutely cannot get enough of these shows. Once you think that 11 cycles of Tyra getting increasingly wacked out would be enough, something like this happens:





Seriously. I don’t care who you are. That’s awesome. 





Jess and I have no real front runners picked out for ANTM yet, but we know for certain that the geniuses who created the below designs are headed for Bryant Park:

That’s all I have for now. Off to Barnes and Noble with my wife! Wahoo!

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Finale Festivities

May 16, 2008 at 4:38 am (Ramble)

Today was an eye-opener.

I always knew that raising and caring for a child is a difficult task, but you don’t fully realize how truly exhausting it is on one’s physical constitution. Jess and I watched our godson Jackson for the day, because his mother threw out her back and was essentially rendered couch-ridden. So obviously, she couldn’t keep up with or carry a 25-pound 9-month-old. From 7:30 AM to 8:30 PM it was just me and Jess, feeding Jackson, changing Jackson, taking Jackson for a stroll outside, and repeatedly putting Jackson to sleep for a nap. Thank God Jackson’s agreeable. He only gets irritable for the right reasons; when he’s hungry, tired, or turd-y. But still; Jackson could have been Emmanuel Himself and it still would take the life out of you.

I finally applied for a checking account here in MD. Soon I’ll be able to get a hold on these financial-limbo-induced ulcers that have been festering since graduation.

On to far more interesting news:

Office Finale AND LOST pre-finale!

Overall, I thought the Office ender was good; it was fresh, but still maintained a few of the comedic gems that makes the Office what it is. Two main qualms, though: it was super depressing. Deciding to go with either the Michael disaster or the Jim/Pam heartbreak would have been sufficient, but having both as concurrent primary plots for the finale just left us bummed out. Also, if Pam had the hunch that Jim was going to propose, wouldn’t she also assume that Andy ruined Jim’s “perfect” opportunity? That felt weird to me. Toby was awesomely creepy, however. Kevin quite easily became “special” without hardly any embellishment, which I thought was impressive. Andy’s losing his luster, though, which I hope does not continue. It was still, all in all, a great finale.

Now to the piece pour le resistance

LOST. I felt the exact same way tonight as I did last season, when the finale was drawing near: I literally, very literally, thanked God for the writers and creators of LOST. Especially Damon Lindelof. I’m seriously bewildered by the intricacies. And honestly, I don’t even know where to start. Here, read this. It’s from my penultimate Pop Culture source, His analyses are mind-boggling and admittedly, sometimes speculation-heavy, but it undoubtedly proves the depth and richness of LOST’s storyline and character structure. I am beyond pumped for the 2-hour season finale in two weeks. After that, 8 miserable months of hiatus. Yuck.

I may find out about the job tomorrow. All signs point to: AH!.

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Inner City Pressure

May 15, 2008 at 4:05 am (News)

Boy o boy did I have a day!

The interview with Jones Networking, a recruiting service, was in Baltimore, so I got all professionaled up and drove to the nearest parking garage I could find. To make a long story short, after 30 minutes of walking around in petrification, I made it to the interview right on time. Yes! Verdict of the interview: I think it went pretty well. I was confident in my abilities. I hope I looked secure, stolid, septuagenarian. Well, maybe not that, but something close to it.

Anyway though, the interview was over at around 3:30, but I also had a networking event to attend elsewhere in the city at 5:30. Even though I only live about 20 minutes from B-more, I knew it would be useless going back and forth, what with the O’s game and rush hour and all that. So I hung out at the Power Plant Barnes and Noble, reading magazines and eating a freshly-prepared Italian sandwich in my killer interview outfit.

After awhile, I casually strolled out of there to get to the Ropewalk Tavern, where the networking event was located. This event was hosted by another recruiting service that I’ve been dealing with, and it was a meeting of various designers and creative employees in the industry. Anyway, I left B&N at around 4:55. I didn’t get to the Tavern until 5:50. Yeah, I walked 2 miles to get there. Not so good with the scaling on maps just yet. Everything seems to be right there!

Needless to say, amidst the poop-myself moments that I had throughout the day, it was a blast to walk around the city, portfolio in hand, looking like I do this everyday. I even developed a don’t-screw-with-me city scowl to ward off the crazies. Such a natural, I am.

Small moment to discuss the big event of the evening:

Whitney won America’s Next Top Model!!….?
Jess and I totally called it! It was a shock to me that Anya didn’t win it. My mom thinks it’s because of the CoverGirl bottom-line, and the photo was pretty dull, and having fresh energy in a commercial is definitely not enough to distract one from her “I only have half a tongue” accent. Still, though, Anya cleaned up in challenges. However, Whitney was definitely the most expressive. Jess and I liked her photos the best week to week; even (if not especially) the “full-figured fetus” shot to the left. Our one piece of advice to the new (and first EVER!) full-figured ANTM winner: have some control in your arms during your runway walk, for pete’s sake! She’s lucky she had that train to throw about on that Pepto-Versace dress during her second run.
All in all though, it was the most surprising Cycle 10 moment overall. Way to end it.

Moving on…

Today marks exactly one month until Jess and I finally get married! Friday I go to Zales to resize my ring, AGAIN. I tell ya, don’t get your ring fitted on a cold day.

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May 14, 2008 at 5:00 am (News)

You guys: I got an interview. It’s a proofreading job in Baltimore, and I’m not exactly sure what to expect. but I’m still pumped about the opportunity to stick with something in my field. My suit that I bought four years ago finally fits, so we’re good in that department.

Random alert!
Sometimes I feel like if I make a mistake while typing, that instead of adhering to the “wipe away completely and start over method,” I should defer to the “carefully select the area of repair and keep the mistake-less section untouched” approach, for fear of wasting something. I don’t really know what it is, but I feel wasteful. Thanks, global warming. You’ve got me all out of sorts.

Tonight’s TV of choice:
America’s Next Top Model Cycle 10 finale!!
Jess and I are rooting for Whitney, but we have our reservations. Anya’s lightyears ahead of Fatima and Whitney, but she can’t pronounce anything correctly. Dominique was eliminated last episode because she was too tranny for CoverGirl. Anya could be too incomprehensible.

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Saturday Night Live – Suze Orman

May 13, 2008 at 6:18 am (Ramble)

My pick of the previous week’s episode

Vodpod videos no longer available. from posted with vodpod

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How Mature

May 13, 2008 at 2:06 am (Ramble)

I am no longer an undergrad.
I’ll soon no longer be single.
And hopefully, I’ll no longer be unemployed.

Times are a-changin, and so’s my blogging style.

Sorry, xanga by the name of PsychoWhoIsFat, your days have long expired.

Allow me to formally introduce: Dennis. Adult. Husband.

Ah, yes. The time has come.

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